Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Queens Blvd. to be Replaced with Hyperloop

Amazing news to report today. I have always been a vocal critic of Queens Boulevard - its noise, its safety hazards, its ugliness. But even I couldn't imagine that it would actually be closed and paved over. And in my lifetime, no less! But yes, it was announced today that Queens Boulevard will be shuttered beginning July 1st of this year and replaced with Elon Musk's cutting edge mode of travel: the Hyperloop.

According to the company, the new "Queens Boulevard Hyperloop" will result in trips from Forest Hills to Manhattan taking -.06 seconds. And there will be a special Depot Station built near the taxi line in front of the 7-Eleven for trips to Asia and the Far East that will take a lot longer, about 30 seconds. 

What's more, the City is reportedly exploring replacing additional inappropriate thoroughfares that run through otherwise delightful neighborhoods with the Hyperloop technology as soon as possible.


  1. In all seriousness, I'd totally be down for this. There'd be a lot fewer fatalities around here, that's for sure.

  2. Perhaps in the year 3045 Drake.

  3. I believed you for a split second but it was over as I heard Asia in 30 secs. :D Good one !!